Version en español |
English version |
(fuente: bridgejokes.blogspot.com) |
(source: bridgejokes.blogspot.com)
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Memoria Finita
"Como va a hacerme el Bridge mas
inteligente? Cada vez que aprendo algo
nuevo, me desaloja algo viejo de mi cerebro.
Te acordas de que cuando tome el curso de
vinos...me olvide de como se maneja?" |
Finite Memory
"And how is Bridge supposed to make me
smarter? Every time I learn something new,
it pushes some old stuff out of my brain.
Remember when I took that winemaking course,
and I forgot how to drive?"
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Huh?
"Siempre llego tarde para mi Bridge, pero lo
compenso... dejando muy tarde la mesa... |
Huh?
"I always arrive late for my Bridge, but I
make up for it by leaving late |
Cuanta Verdad
El cerebro es un órgano maravilloso.
Comienza a funcionar ni bien uno se
despierta y no para hasta que uno se sienta
en la mesa de bridge. |
How True
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts
working the moment you get up in the morning
and does not stop until you sit at the
bridge table. |
No tan Inteligente
Un hombre se acerca a una mesa donde están
jugando 3 hombres y un perro, que jugaba muy
concentrado.
"Este debe ser un perro muy inteligente,"
comento el hombre"...No tan
inteligente...contesto el compañero del
perro, "Se olvido de desbloquear el as en un
Coup de Viena en la ultima mano.” |
Not That Smart
A man walked by a table where 3 people were
playing bridge with a dog, which was playing
with extraordinary concentration.
"This must be a very smart dog," the man
commented"Not so smart," said the dog’s
partner, "He forgot to unblock the ace in a
straightforward Vienna Coup in the last hand.” |
Experto de Bridge
Un experto de Bridge es una
persona que puede decirle mas de lo que UD
quiere escuchar de este juego. |
Bridge Expert
A Bridge Expert is a person
who can tell you more about the game than
you really care to know. |
Dos Reinas
P. Hal Sims era uno de los miembros del equipo
“The 4 Horsemen” – un equipo que gano eventos mayores en
los años 30.
Hoy se lo recuerda por su increíble habilidad para leer
el lenguaje corporal de sus opps. El decía que nunca se
equivocaba cuando tenia una finesse para cualquiera de
los dos lados.
Un día sus amigos le tendieron una trampa y prepararon
una mano con una finesse para ambos lados en el palo de
triunfo. El miro a ambos opps intensamente e
increíblemente dijo “Dios... – ambos tienen la dama!”
No es necesario decir que esta era la trampa preparada,
habían agregado una dama en las dos manos para que el
perdiera independientemente de para que lad la hiciera.
La leyenda de la lectura corporal de P. Hal Sims, se
mantiene firme e intacta.
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Two Timing Queen
P. Hal Sims was one of “The 4 Horsemen” – a team that
won several major tournaments in the 1930s. Nowadays, he
is mainly remembered for his incredible ability to read
the body language of his opponents and, by so doing,
made the extraordinary claim that he could never ever
misguess the queen in a 2-way finesse position.
One day, his friends played a trick on him and set up a
hand where there was a 2-way finesse in the trump suit.
He gazed at both opponents intently and then made the
incredible statement “Goddamn it – they’ve both got the
queen!”
Needless to say, this was the trick his friends were
trying to pull on him. They inserted an extra Queen in
the rigged hand, so that whichever way he finessed, he
would lose.
The record of P. Hal Sims, body language reader
extrodinaire, remains firmly intact.
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Quien!
Erik y su equipo acababa de ganar la Bermuda
Bowl. El vuelve a casa y va a su club para
jugar al bridge. En la mitad del juego, esta
compitiendo en espadas contra sus opps. que
estaban subastando en corazón. Finalmente,
el pone de una forma muy firme el cartón de
3 espadas sobre la mesa como para que no le
doblen. No funciona...los opps doblan el
contrato.
Erik mira al jugador que le doblo y dice:
"UD sabe quien soy yo?'
El jugador
le contesta: "Si, yo se quien es UD."
Erik dice: "UD sabe cuantos masterpoints
tengo?"
El jugador le contesta "No, pero UD sabe
cuantas cartas de espadas tengo en mi mano?" |
Sezs Who!
Erik and his team had just won the World
Championships. He returned to his hometown
and went to his local club for a game of
bridge. About midway through the game, he is
competing in spades against the opponents,
who were bidding hearts. Finally, he yanks
out the 3S bid from the bidding box and
slaps it on the table loudly, so he won't
get doubled. It doesn't work. His opponent
doubles.
Erik looks at him and says: "Do you know who
I am?'
The guy says: "Yes I know who you are."
Erik says: "Do you know how many
masterpoints I have?"
The guy says, "No, but do you know how many
spades I have?"
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Humildad
La Humildad es algo extraño – en el momento
que UD cree tenerla, desaparece! |
Humility
Humility is a strange thing – the moment you
think you have it, you have lost it! |
Lamento de Novicio
“Todos los torneos de bridge
en los que he participado tienen 3 elementos
en común – un comienzo optimista, una mitad
dura y un final espantoso” |
Novice’s Lament
“All the bridge tournaments I
have participated in have 3 things in common
– an optimistic beginning, a tough middle
and a lousy end” |